Author: Denizb33
Image: Beautiful Crimson Yellow Sunrise (here)Trimeric was invented by Charles A. Stone.
1. A Trimeric has 4 stanzas
2. The first stanza has 4 lines
3. The other three stanzas have 3 lines each
4. The first line of each stanza is a refrain of the corresponding line
1. A Trimeric has 4 stanzas
2. The first stanza has 4 lines
3. The other three stanzas have 3 lines each
4. The first line of each stanza is a refrain of the corresponding line
in the first stanza (so 2nd stanza starts with the second line, the third
stanza starts with the third line, etc.).
5. The sequence of lines, then, is abcd, b – -, c – -, d – -.
Note: No other rules on line length, meter, or rhyme.stanza starts with the third line, etc.).
5. The sequence of lines, then, is abcd, b – -, c – -, d – -.
but Hank kept the rhyming
crimson yellow peeping over the horizon
getting brighter by the minute but not fully
just stirring up and still dizzy feeling broken
already sunrise with birds chirping incessantly
getting brighter by the minute but not fully
Grace at d'Verse Poetry Form: trimericcrimson yellow peeping over the horizon
getting brighter by the minute but not fully
just stirring up and still dizzy feeling broken
already sunrise with birds chirping incessantly
getting brighter by the minute but not fully
the free-flowing booze made his head heavy
just stirring up and still dizzy feeling broken
felt like throwing up but kept his senses easy
just stirring up and still dizzy feeling broken
reflecting sadly he was not where he belonged
an idler not used to staying on the job for long
already sunrise with birds chirping incessantly
yet to receive the stipend he was to get rightly
but none seemed to bother he sensed ruefully
well. that's beautifully told... but sad :-(
ReplyDeleteyou gave me the feels, Hank.
yours,
David
I second David's remark. :)
DeleteOh boy, it turned out not so well for the poor guy.
ReplyDeleteOh wow, poor guy... Sometimes, we just feel so out of place that nothing feels right. Even if there's nothing wrong, per se, or you just can't pin point that feeling exactly, it's there and it eats away at you. Such vivid imagery in this piece, I find it beautifully solemn and immersing. Poignant, too; I'm certain there are many who could find themselves in this piece, it's a more universal experience than we might think. The thought alone comforts me. I always enjoy your work! :)
ReplyDeleteSeems like he finds himself somewhere that may push him to take action. I can remember moments like that, where situations became so intolerable there was nothing to do but act. I hope he does. Very emotionally intense writing, Hank.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like the morning after isn't so bright. A sad poem Hank.
ReplyDelete"already sunrise with birds chirping incessantly."
ReplyDeleteThis is poignant, I can really identify with these lines:
ReplyDelete'the free-flowing booze made his head heavy
felt like throwing up but kept his senses easy'
reminds me why I stopped drinking!
oh, oh. this hits the heart, beautifully sad.
ReplyDeleteI'm out on the front porch at the moment, among incessantly chirping birds, but I'm DIGGIN' IT! I guess everything boils down to circumstance, eh? I feel for your subject, though; been there myself.
ReplyDeleteGreat use of the form!
A poignant moment in time well-captured in this trimeric, Kaykuala! Great write :-)
ReplyDeleteYou took me on a journey! Wasn't expecting what came after stanza one, well done Hank!!!
ReplyDeleteOh this is incredibly poignant!! You have done a seamless job of executing the Trimeric form 💝
ReplyDeleteWonderful poem, Hank. Poor guy, but at least he
ReplyDelete"kept his senses easy".
Hank,
ReplyDeleteYou give us a vivid psychological portrait of unease framed by the "incessantly chirping birds", a vivid contrast to the persona's lethargy.
pax,
dora
In deep sorrow the beauty of nature can feel like mockery I think
ReplyDeletethat white lightning sure is deadly ~
ReplyDelete