Image: Pushed by Tender Forces (here)
A Shadorma is a non-rhyming 6-line poem
with a syllable count of 3/5/3/3/7/5
The Shadorma
flying fox
nocturnal creature
on the sly
in the dark
nibbling on fruits so quietly
just like human trait
A Joseph's Star is a non-rhyming 8-line
poem with syllable count of 1/3/5/7/7/5/3/1
written center-aligned to end up diamond shaped
The Joseph's Star
what
can it be
holding back the crowd
a man with a boxing glove
but why should it come to this
when pushed to the wall
he fights back
right?
For Jen's hosting at MLMM's B&P's Shadorma
and Beyond - the Joseph's Star and
Mary's at PU's Poetry Pantry #265
Mary's at PU's Poetry Pantry #265
When push comes to shove, sometimes you have to fight back.
ReplyDeleteWe can't win them all, but we can try
ReplyDeleteBoth are well done! I can't imagine trying to make words fit into such requirements.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure I completely follow the first poem but I definitely enjoyed the second one. Got me thinking.
ReplyDeleteRelating the analogy of some people 'nibbling' on other's assets on the quiet leaving a trail of 'heart-breaks'
DeleteHank
Like the comparison of the fox to human nature ;-)
ReplyDeleteThere can be the subtle, slow eating away and the more explicit, physical conflict. Both need a reaction to preserve individual integrity. Interesting poems.
ReplyDeleteoh i love the first one best, its like giving us a riddle; I got it i got it the answer is: FRUIT BATS
ReplyDeletehave a nice Sunday
much love...
Love the way these two pieces sneak around until they get to the punch. And the forms are perfect for a sports theme, since it allows lovers and strangers alike to enjoy it.
ReplyDeleteinteresting structures.. and interesting poems.
ReplyDeleteAh, when pushed to the wall, what choice does he have?
ReplyDeleteLoved both the forms :D so intriguing!
ReplyDeleteWell penned :D
very enjoyable lines...love them all...
ReplyDeletei love boxing , and i can tell you that there is a lot of poetry in there
ReplyDeleteMaybe pushing someone against the wall is not the best way to avoid the words of fists.
ReplyDeleteAh I like both these forms--3/5/7 seem to be great numbers for poetry
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of the flying fox nibbling on fruits.....
ReplyDeleteNow these were interesting forms new to me...love learning abut new things...and you created some wonderful poems Hank!
ReplyDeleteSometimes we have to fight back.
ReplyDeleteGreat words Hank.
Yvonne.
yes, fighting back is mandatory in some circumstances.
ReplyDeleteenjoyed the first poem too - the observations are quite true
You know what they say a fox can be sly..
ReplyDeleteI think sometimes in life we do have to fight back...depends on the circumstances..
I loved the Shadorma which told us how the flying fox survives by being sensible without making a show of finding food to eat. With the Joseph's star it is probably slightly better to punched with boxing glove than with a fist!
ReplyDeleteLike both of them and I am always interested in learning syllabic forms. Thank you,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
Wonderfully executed style (both).
ReplyDeleteZQ
Great use of form the meanings carried well.
ReplyDeleteBoth very well done -- but oh, that sneaky fox!
ReplyDelete