Whispers of sweet nothings softly
Knocked a little a time expecting
How efficient it was to be silly
Pushed in as much of the same trying
Love knew no bounds but still insisting
Mindful of being snubbed as before
Trudged on tenacious in reckoning
Persisting and pulsating even more
A sly smile was all that he perceived
But just as well there was a response
Open your heart and not to deceive
Desires in calm waters not enjoined
Note: Not schooled in poetry writing wondering if this is
acceptable.
Tony hosting at d’Verse’s Forms for All with - bang bang bang crash on the intricacies of
writing accentual alliteration.
writing accentual alliteration.
quite lovely!
ReplyDeleteALOHA from Honolulu
Comfort Spiral
~ > < } } ( ° >
Thanks Cloudia!
DeleteHank
sometimes it is hard to love again esspecially after being snubbed, but love surprises us and finds a way when we least expect it, so...smiles
ReplyDeleteyeah, you are good hank.
Thanks Brian! Honestly I'm lost! Took the cue from others and hoping for the best.
DeleteHank
smiles..sounds like there's something tender going on... and trust is always a step towards the unknown...
ReplyDeletehiccups do come in between..
ReplyDeletebut people in love do overcome that :)
Smiles !!
been away for a while.. hope you are doing fine !!
Oh the battle of love and communications.. usually it sorts itself out..
ReplyDeletethe way i read this, some of the alliterative sounds seemed to be in the word rather than the beginning, which made me more aware of stressed syllables. i liked the rhyme scheme as well. you have conveyed a sense of hopeful yearning.
ReplyDeleteHank, a very lovely poem--funny how those sly smiles can either get you into trouble or out of it ;-)
ReplyDeleteNeatly written Hank - and as Heidi says, some of the alliterative sounds are contained within the words, which makes them more subtle.
ReplyDeleteThis is a lovely poem too; I hope it works out for them in the end.
Yeah, but have to take chances I suppose, still hard to do
ReplyDeleteHank, I found this very well crafted. Love the first stanza... hope they'll work it out!
ReplyDelete~Miriam