Sunday, November 23, 2014

Fluttering and floating

                                                                            Attribution: Lambtron
Image: Executing a pirouette (here)

The given words:
flutter pirouettes spills forgotten moments decision
resolute neglected cloudy children stains miserable

She kept looking into the glass window
Imagining herself as the prima donna
Fluttering and floating as the falling snow
Executing pirouettes in forms from afar

Just as agile she could take the spills
Forgotten but moments of her affliction
Resolute and brave with strong wills
She was to insist for a strong decision

She had neglected it for far too long
An issue no more as cloudy as before
Read it on the ‘net it could be done
Negative thoughts were just a damper

Children charted out their own destiny
Parents did understand and gave support
Stains on thoughts could sow infamy
Been miserable so enough of the rot

Should then able to whirl with the flow
Just a simple surgery to make it even
Others born with ten dainty little toes
Couldn't understand why she had eleven

For Brenda's hosting at Sunday Whirl Wordle #188 and
Mary's at Poets United's Poetry Pantry # 228


  1. Phew! What a surprise you gave us in that last line.

  2. Well done ... and agree with Viv ... what a surprise ending!

  3. Yes! Yes! I agree... what a delightful turn at the very last line as graceful and surprising as a final climatic leap on stage. Bravo!

  4. I never saw that twist coming. Fantastic work!

  5. They make their own way indeed, nice twist to, with one too many a toe

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  7. Ha.. yes wonder if it's easier or harder with that extra toe.. :-)

  8. Interesting and original write - there was much to enjoy here and some very strong lines too, like: "Stains on thoughts could sow infamy..." Thank you... With Best Wishes Scott

  9. Every child wants to fit in and whether it be red hair, spectacles or even an extra toe this is an extra burden for the them. I was color blind and even this caused great mirth!

  10. Hank, you surprised me with your closing line......I do hope she was then able to twirl to her heart's desire.

  11. Eleven toes? You have rocked the prompt with your creativity.

  12. Yes, children don't always understand why they are different.

  13. Wow, Hank, this blew me away. The little would-be ballerina, and here, with my dark and twisted mind I thought it was something sinister (as I am wont to do!). Eleven toes. Whew! Great little mystery here, wonderful solution. Love, Amelita

  14. Most creative Hank. Loved the dancers and of course your verse.

  15. I love this Hank - especially the unexpected ending!

  16. Lovely poem with a nice little twist!

  17. Hmph. Give or take a toe, this is masterful.

  18. Children definitely have to chart their own destiny. Very nice poem!

  19. Stains on thoughts . . . love that . . . and what a surprise ending.

  20. Great writing. The flow of the poem feels like a smooth dance.

  21. very enjoyable read. i especially enjoyed the ending!

  22. Surprising finish--nicely done!