Friday, June 13, 2014

she gingerly peeps out!

                                                                                      Attribution: Aruna at ml.wiki
Image: Winter Melon flowers (here)

To revise Basho's haiku " the Flower of the Melon"
yube ni mo asa ni mo tsukazu uri no hana
(translation by R.H.Blyth)

it belongs
neither to morning nor to evening
the flower of the melon                  © Matsuo Basho
                                     
Playing hide and seek
When dressed for the kill beauty
in stunning yellow

Like a coy maiden
Only seen and not heard she
gingerly peeps out                         Hank’s

For Chev's CARPE DIEM revise that haiku #6

9 comments:

  1. beautiful! the maiden is so shy:) only a rare chance to have her glimpse

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  2. I love the comparison you have used Hank ... the hidden flowers of the melon with the shy girl ... nicely composed revision.

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  3. A little peep is enough to get one curious

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  4. Said it well and in fewer words, Hank. As good as the master.

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  5. ah its the quiet ones that can be rather deadly
    when they finally speak....smiles.

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  6. Ah, gifting the plant with human attributes!
    Fun.

    Thanks for your visit.

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